Plonk Crazy Golf at Borough Market is exactly the kind of place you hope to find hiding under London Bridge. Tucked away beneath the arches of Borough High Street, it feels a bit clandestine, a bit chaotic, and full of energy. This is one of two Plonk locations across the city, with its sibling over in Hackney, but the Borough spot leans hard into its environs and owns them.
The whole venue is wrapped in street art from a crew of some of London’s most well-known graffiti artists. Walls, ceilings, and even the floors have been turned into a full 360-degree gallery, giving the space that raw, underground buzz which matches its location beneath the railway arcs. It’s colourful, loud, and (crucially!) it’s London!
The nine-hole course takes the city’s most famous wonders and delightedly messes with them. You’ll launch your ball up a giant red phone box slope, ride a wave inspired by the Thames Barrier, and reel your way across a certain very famous bridge. One of the most memorable holes is inspired by HMS Belfast. First you must whack the ball up onto the vessel (no easy feat!), and once it’s on board the hole turns into a pinball-style test, the ball bouncing in all directions.
What really raises this venue is everything around the course. The entrance arch is home to a proper cocktail bar, mixing up excellent drinks, whilst next to this is dedicated retro arcade where you can lose time playing classics like Pong or Mario Kart. There are pool tables, a huge library of board games, and each round of golf even includes tokens so you can dive straight into the gaming action.
The course itself is challenging and unhinged, which makes it far more enjoyable than many of the safer, forgettable mini golf options around the capital. It’s chaotic in the best way, satisfying skill but never taking itself too seriously.
Off-peak, a full run of all nine holes costs £12.50, which feels like great value considering how much is packed in. Plonk Crazy Golf at Borough Market is a daring stage for the city’s landmarks and ethos, served with street art, cocktails, and the right amount of insanity. It’s super fun, and honestly, precisely what crazy golf should be.
